Have you ever experienced moments when you can't quite remember how to begin a prayer or start a song that you've known since childhood? Well, that's a little bit like this post, although I'm not having trouble remembering anything. The thoughts have been swirling around in my head and held in my heart for weeks. I simply don't know how to start. I guess I'll just say it.
My husband has prostate cancer.
Blurting it out like that is so shocking, as if I had uttered a profanity. The truth is, I am still a bit taken aback by the diagnosis. It came so suddenly, unexpectedly, without warning or even the slightest suspicion. And I haven't quite figured out how to share this news comfortably, gracefully. I've never been good at sharing bad news. Certainly, there is a bright side which helps soften the blow. The cancer is confined to the prostate, it has been caught early and the prognosis is very good. We are truly, truly grateful for that!!
Some have said, "Well, if you're going to have cancer that is the kind to have." Perhaps, but no one wants any kind of cancer, right? And some men have died from prostate cancer. My grandfather is one and I have heard of others. I know of one man who currently has advanced prostate cancer and is in the fight for his life. It is, like all cancer, an ugly, horrible disease. But as I said, we are grateful that in Jim's case it was discovered early, before it was given a chance to grow into a more serious problem.
In November Jim had a routine physical with his primary care physician. During the exam she felt something odd, a small lump or polyp on his prostate. He followed up with a urologist, who determined that the lump was nothing more than a benign cyst or calcium deposit located near the prostate but not actually on it. Nothing to worry about. However, as an added precaution the doctor opted to proceed with further blood testing. Lo and behold, the blood work came back abnormal, so a biopsy was scheduled for mid-December.
The morning of the biopsy, I dropped Jim off at the surgery center and waited at home as we reside a mere five minutes away. The nurse called me when it was time to go pick him up. The procedure went well and Jim recovered quickly. We busied ourselves with our typical Christmas preparations as we waited to hear the results. Honestly, we were expecting everything to be fine, so we were a bit surprised when the urologist called Jim on the Sunday after Christmas. We had just returned from Mass and Jim was fixing himself a sandwich. In fact, we normally head to the parish hall after Mass for "coffee and doughnuts" and to visit with friends, but I had a strong inkling to head straight home. We would have missed the doctor's call if we had stayed. The urologist explained that out of the 12 samples biopsied one of the them tested positive for cancer, even so he seemed optimistic. He used words like slow-growing, a small area, not very aggressive, caught early. All the words meant to soften the blow, to keep up one's hope. A follow-up appointment was made for a little more than a week later. In the meantime, other tests were being evaluated and an oncologist would be consulted. By the way, Jim's PSA was normal, there was no enlargement of the prostate or any other outward signs indicating any problems.
One of the blood tests measures the patient's genetic tendency toward the disease and Jim's came back on the high end. Another opinion was rendered by a second pathologist who discovered cancerous cells in not one, but two of the biopsied samples. The final result of all of the further testing and consultations is that the risk level for Jim is actually higher than originally thought and the best option for him at this stage in the game is to have the prostate surgically removed sooner rather than later.
His surgery date is March 4.
If all goes well, Jim should be fully recovered and in good shape for our daughter's wedding April 25, as well as for a later surgery to repair a torn rotator cuff. Yep, that's right, but I think we'll deal with that one after the wedding!
We truly appreciate the prayers, love, and support of all our family and friends and hold each and every one of you in our hearts and prayers as well. We are forever grateful for the gift of faith and for the love and mercy of our Father whose generosity can never be surpassed.
That's all for now. I hope to share more of what's on my heart in the coming days and weeks. There's a lot there.
If all goes well, Jim should be fully recovered and in good shape for our daughter's wedding April 25, as well as for a later surgery to repair a torn rotator cuff. Yep, that's right, but I think we'll deal with that one after the wedding!
We truly appreciate the prayers, love, and support of all our family and friends and hold each and every one of you in our hearts and prayers as well. We are forever grateful for the gift of faith and for the love and mercy of our Father whose generosity can never be surpassed.
That's all for now. I hope to share more of what's on my heart in the coming days and weeks. There's a lot there.
