Thursday, December 20, 2012

Powerful Little Gem

"We find it so difficult to accept our own deficiencies because we imagine they make us unlovable. Since we are defective in this or that aspect, we feel that we do not deserve to be loved. Living under God's gaze makes us realize how mistaken that is. Love is given freely, it's not deserved, and our deficiencies don't prevent God from loving us - just the opposite! Thus we are freed of the terrible, despair-inducing sense that we must become "good enough" to deserve to be loved.
... God's gaze also enables us to be supremely daring in our desire for holiness. We have the right to aspire to the summit, to aspire to the highest level of holiness, because God wants and is able to grant it. ... God can make us, sinners that we are, into saints: his grace can accomplish even that miracle, and we can have unlimited faith in the power of his love."
The above quote is taken from a beautiful, little gem of a book called Interior Freedom by Father Jacques Philippe. I have it on my Kindle and I carry it with me to weekly Eucharistic Adoration. The book is only about 100 pages long, but is perfectly organized into brief sections within the chapters, each offering just the right amount of wisdom on which to pray and reflect during time spent with Our Lord in the chapel. Admittedly, I have not finished it - the third book by Jacques Philippe that I have read. I am not even half way through it - BUT what I have read and digested thus far has been life-changing. Everyone should read this book!! Father Philippe's profound insights into God's love and mercy are an antidote to all that seems broken in our world and in particular ourselves.

I will post an update upon finishing the book. In the meantime, if you own a Kindle I highly recommend spending the $6.12 Amazon is now selling it for, or it is definitely well worth the $8.95 for the paperback edition.
 

Monday, December 17, 2012

Tapestry - The O Antiphons Begin

Surrounded by His glory:
It is a gloomy sort of day - damp and gray, but not too terribly cold for December. The resident squirrels have enjoyed nibbling away on the little pumpkins and gourds that I have left on my deck. They've pretty much made quite a mess of it all. For weeks, the pesky little creatures have been very busy burying and digging up acorns in my flower pots. They have uprooted several of my pansies in the process.
A recent weekend found us traipsing over hill and dale in search of the perfect Christmas tree. Of course, as I remarked at the tree farm, there really is no perfect tree, but it is possible to find the right one. And we did:
Erin helps out while Jim cuts down our pick - a Concolor Fir (aka a White Fir)
Sam & Katie AND Isaac found their tree, too!

The afternoon was warm, not bad for hunting Christmas trees. And the farm was beautiful. The weather people promise colder temperatures by week's end. I don't mind really. I actually like it cold in winter and I love snow. And usually by the time spring rolls around the warmer, brighter days are most welcome indeed! But for now ... let it snow, let it snow, let it snow! One can only hope! 

This place called Home:
My dear Megan arrived home Saturday evening after spending nearly 4 months away in Europe. She requested that the house be totally decorated for Christmas prior to her arrival, so here's a few glimpses of some of what I worked on all last week.
The Christmas Tree


I have recently become enamored by peacocks, partly due to Flannery O'Connor
and partly due to their symbolism.
But mostly due to their astounding beauty.
They symbolize immortality (or eternity) and God's omniscience.


This nativity set was handed down to us from Jim's parents.
I love it!
 




We moved the garage sale find (table) to the living room to make room for the Christmas tree
in the family room. I set up my Snow Village on it - which Isaac loves!






 
Our Fontanini Nativity
Isaac loves this, too, and he can touch or pick up the figures just like his Mommy
 and his aunties and uncle did when they were little.



My kitchen window
Verbum Dei:
As the earth brings forth its plants, and a garden makes its growth spring up, so will the Lord God make justice and praise spring up before all the nations. Isaiah 61:11

Oremus:
Wisdom, O holy Word of God, you govern all creation with your strong yet tender care. Come and show your people the way to salvation. 
This evening marks the beginning of the  “O Antiphons” - seven antiphons that are recited (or chanted)  before and after praying the Magnificat during evening Vespers. They cover  the period before Christmas from December 17 to the 23rd. They bring with them a sense that Christ is drawing nearer and fill our hearts with a joyful anticipation.
Read about the O Antiphons here.  
Pondering them in my heart:
The senseless murder of 20 beautiful children last Friday along with 6 adults in Newtown, CT has our nation reeling in anguish and their parents and loved ones suffering unimaginable grief. I spent all of Friday afternoon in tears and have discussed the horrific incident at length with family and friends, questioning why and how and offering my own feeble answers. I have watched the news reports and have read the papers. And somehow, I am left now feeling too much a voyeur. I think its time to slip away, to allow the families time to grieve in privacy and to begin to bury their babies without all of us peering in. We will always keep the memory of them in our hearts and we will continue to pray - certainly. And maybe we will come away learning to value life a little more. Maybe we will learn that kindness and compassion really do make a difference. Maybe we will be less self-centered and more willing to reach out to others. To bid a cheerful hello as we pass a stranger on the street or make it a point to smile more. To not be afraid ever to say I love you no matter how awkward it may seem. And maybe we will be more mindful of God and His love for us.
Quote of the day:
“Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.”   - Mother Teresa of Calcutta
 Family glimpses:





 




All Creatures Great and Small:

Here's ol' Happy Cat in his new bed.

  
 

Friday, November 30, 2012

Weaving my Tapestry

“It will be very interesting one day to follow the pattern of our life as it is spread out like a beautiful tapestry. As long as we live here we see only the reverse side of the weaving, and very often the pattern, with its threads running wildly, doesn't seem to make sense. Some day, however, we shall understand. In looking back over the years we can discover how a red thread goes through the pattern of our life: the Will of God." - Maria Augusta von Trapp

This is an attempt to revisit the idea of including a weekly (or so) Daybook to the blog. I've missed creating them here, but really wanted to revamp the idea - give it my own unique twist if you will. So, here's what I've dreamed up. Hope it is to your liking, dear readers.

Surrounded by His glory:

Driving through the neighborhood yesterday at dusk, I winced a bit at the twinkling lights bedecking the shrubbery of the early-bird decorators and at the stately Christmas trees glowing impertinently in a few living room windows. Savoring the last week between Thanksgiving and the First Sunday of Advent, my front porch is still home to several pumpkins, gourds and Indian corn. The grapevine wreath on my front door sports an array of orange and golden leaves. As I pulled in the driveway, there slowly rising in the eastern sky I spied the most magnificent autumn moon. It was hanging there like a huge silver dollar, exquisite and beautiful. O joyous, perfect moon! More beautiful than all the Christmas lights put together! [An excerpt from this year's Christmas letter to friends & family]


  
This place called Home:

I began today putting away my autumn decorations, mostly because tomorrow is the first of December and Sunday begins Advent, but it also helped that Jim noticed my garage sale find really needs mending. I have plans to put it to good use over the Christmas holiday, so I cleared it off so that dear hubby could carry it down (with my assistance) to his workshop for repair.


I have ideas to strip and antique this table one day. Would also like to add different knobs. It's a cute, little thing and Jim really likes the detail in the pine, so maybe I'll leave it alone. Not bad for what I paid for it -- can't exactly remember but it was around $20.
Every year when the kids were small, I'd buy them a new family Christmas book, so this morning I trotted down to the basement to retrieve them. They are now waiting patiently in a basket for Isaac - and anyone else - to delve into. Besides the annual family Christmas book, I always gave each of my children books for Christmas and I still do!

 

Verbum Dei:
From today's Gospel:
As he was walking by the Sea of Galilee, he saw two brothers, Simon who is called Peter, and his brother Andrew, casting a net into the sea; they were fishermen. He said to them, "Come after me, and I will make you fishers of men."  At once they left their nets and followed him. (Matthew 4:18)
I just love that line: "Come after me, and I will make you fishers of men."
Have you been caught up in any nets lately? 
Oremus:
Hail and blessed be the hour and moment
In which the Son of God was born
of the most pure Virgin Mary,
at midnight,
in Bethlehem,
in piercing cold.
In that hour vouchsafe, O my God!
to hear my prayer and grant my desires,
through the merits of Our Savior Jesus Christ,
and of His blessed Mother.
Amen.
 It is piously believed that whoever recites the above prayer 
fifteen times a day from the feast of St. Andrew until Christmas will obtain what is asked.


Pondering them in my heart: 
On the universal motherhood of the Blessed Virgin Mary -

When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there whom he loved, he said to his mother, “Woman, behold, your son.” Then he said to the disciple,“Behold, your mother.” And from that hour the disciple took her into his home. (John 19:26-27)

[At] the foot of the Cross there was ... accomplished her maternal cooperation with the Savior's whole mission through her actions and sufferings. Along the path of this collaboration with the work of her Son, the Redeemer, Mary's motherhood itself underwent a singular transformation, becoming even more imbued with "burning charity" toward all those to whom Christ's mission was directed. Through this "burning charity," which sought to achieve, in union with Christ, the restoration of "supernatural life to souls," Mary entered, in a way all her own, into the one mediation "between God and men" which is the mediation of the man Christ Jesus. - Pope John Paul II, Redemptoris Mater, n. 39.
 ... Mary's new motherhood is not some vague or abstract sort of thing. It's concrete and personal.  And even though it's universal, it's also intensely particular. Mary is your mother. She is my mother. In this light, John Paul thinks it's significant that Mary's new motherhood on Calvary is expressed in the singular, "Behold, your son" not "Behold, your billions of spiritual children." The Pope gets to the heart of it when he says, "Even when the same woman is the mother of many children, her personal relationship with each one of them is of the very essence of motherhood." (Redemptoris Mater, n. 45). In short: Mary is uniquely, particularly, personally your mother and my mother, and doesn't lose us in the crowd. - Michael E. Gaitley, MIC, 33 Days to Morning Glory

Quote of the day:
"The moon is a friend for the lonesome to talk to." - Carl Sandburg

 Family glimpses:









 All Creatures Great and Small:


Because God has given me an abiding love for all His creation I can't help but share images of His created world here in this space. You may think me daft, but I have a particular fondness for dogs (as some of you know all too well), especially for Holly, my wee dachshund, who has wiggled her way deep into the recesses of my heart. 





Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Black Thursday

Puh-lease, Black Thursday

This article in The Washington Post mentions that, according to the National Retailers Association, millions of people do want to shop on Thanksgiving Day. The article explains that a lot of people welcome the escape from boredom and mundane dinner conversation:
“Stores are tapping into something that is very real — there is demand for this,” said Adam ­Hanft, a brand strategist for ­Hanft Projects in New York. “The reality is, people start to get cabin fever after awhile. They’re fighting about politics. They want to get out and do something.”
Kmart apparently has evolved from opening its doors for shoppers who need last minute items such as tin foil and gravy to now offering door-buster deals on large screen TV's as early as 6 a.m. on Thanksgiving Day. 

And I'm sure shoppers will engage in their fair share of pushing, shoving, and grabbing. Not to mention cursing and swearing. 

What is wrong with the world?

For one thing, God is dead to them. The Washington Post article never once mentions God let alone even being thankful (I know - that wasn't the focus of the article, but still.) Of course, if we diminish or outright banish the true object of our gratitude than why bother mentioning Him? Why not change the name of the holiday to Black Thursday? Especially, if taking part in mad shopping sprees is all it really means to you? 

As long as I can remember, Thanksgiving Day has indeed heralded the start of the Holiday shopping season. What is the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade all about anyhow?  Nevertheless, until fairly recently Thanksgiving was first and foremost a time to gather family together - to count our blessings, to break bread together and okay, even, to watch a lot of football. I suppose the true meaning of Thanksgiving may have eluded some even before the direct onslaught of Black Friday (now Thursday) deals - the logical result of failing to allow God to reside in our hearts, failing to make Him the centerpiece of our celebrations and of our lives. Get out of my way God (if you even exist), got to get my grubby hands on that $199.99 high definition plasma screen TV before they're all sold out! Thank you Wal-Mart, for providing more bang for my buck. I am eternally grateful! Is this what Thanksgiving is all about?

Go ahead, call me sentimental - even overly so - but I will not surrender my observance of Thanksgiving Day to abject consumerism. My kids will be the first to tell you that Thanksgiving Day is my very favorite non-religious holiday. Non-religious, but God-welcoming nonetheless! I refuse to allow a day that is set aside for remembering and celebrating all the God-given blessings in my life, replete with delectable gastronomical delights, surrounded by the people who mean the most in the world to me, to be hijacked by maddening door-buster deals just as the last bite of pumpkin pie barely passes my lips. 

I think it's worth remembering what the first Thanksgiving Day was all about:






Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Put on the Armor of God

So Obama wins again. A few of my friends are ecstatic, but many more of them are heartbroken. Some are downright afraid of what will come to pass over the next four years. I had a feeling all along that he would win a second term, but maintained hope that I would be proven wrong. Although I am not a huge Romney fan, I did cast my vote for him. I went to bed last night pretty much knowing it wasn't looking good for Romney and awoke this morning to the headline Obama wins on the front page of The Washington Post. Not surprised, but I nevertheless uttered an audible ugh as I read it while my dachshund peered up at me begging to be let out. And so, life goes on. The dog still has needs. The dishes still need to be washed. My laundry still needs to be folded and put away. And most of all, God still deserves our praise and thanksgiving - our love. 

I've been thinking about a lot of things this morning. First of all, I feel oddly energized as I consider the election results.As a faithful, practicing Catholic (not the cafeteria kind, or the Christmas & Easter type, or the non-church-going-but-still-call-myself-Catholic Catholic) I am highly concerned about what lies ahead regarding the HHS mandate and I sincerely hope and pray that the U.S. Catholic bishops don't cave on this issue. As I was trying to fall asleep last night, the following encouraging passage from Ephesians popped into my head: Put on the armor of God so that you may be able to stand firm against the tactics of the devil. (Ephesians 6:11). I am honored to put on the armor of God and will continue to fight until my dying day. With Obama in the White House for another four years, we know what we're up against (well sort of, who knows what he currently has up his sleeve?). We are surely disappointed, but we should be fired up now more than ever to continue the fight! Actually, a part of me wonders if Romney had been elected, would we have become a little too relaxed in our effort to defend the Church? Maybe become a little too trusting that he would actually work hard to upend the injustice against the Church? Perhaps - and maybe I'm just cynical - it really would not have been as important to him as it is to us. Not sure if he wouldn't have placed the rights of the unborn on the back burner, instead focusing all his energy on creating new jobs and balancing the budget.

I hate to say it, but most of us realize that we didn't just arrive here overnight. The rising tide of secularism has been here for many years. There are reportedly more people today who describe themselves as non-church goers as ever before. People are saying they want to move to another country ... but where would you go? We are becoming more and more like western Europe and have been on that path for quite awhile. We've allowed the news media (the mainstream media wins the prize for campaigning most effectively for Obama), the entertainment industry, and the institutions of higher learning to shape who we are and to carve the path we find ourselves traveling.

Sadly, and I've said this before, I don't think the U.S. bishops as a body were effectively doing their job for a long, long time and now that we're faced with the imminent erosion of our religious liberties they have finally started to band together and speak out. Why have they been silent for so long? Until recently, we've heard little from them  - sure there have been a few voices crying out, but not enough! Now that their (our) backs are up against the wall? Well, better late than never, right? I just can't help but wonder about the 49% of Catholics who cast Church teaching aside and voted for Obama. Had the bishops been doing their job all these years, would that have happened? Ultimately, of course, we are all individually responsible for learning the truths of our faith and informing our conscience, but the fact remains - the shepherds are our teachers and must lead the faithful unerringly and uncompromisingly to Christ. It is imperative that we keep our bishops and priests in our daily prayers. We need to pray that they continue to speak up for us and for the most defenseless members of the body of Christ. Pray that they remain holy men of God. May He grant them the wisdom and fortitude to speak the truth and act on it. And lead the faithful along the paths of righteousness.

Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger (Pope Benedict XVI) said many years ago that the Church is going to become small and ultimately more pure. I think we're seeing that come to pass. 


“The church will become small and will have to start afresh more or less from the beginning. She will no longer be able to inhabit many of the edifices she built in prosperity. As the number of her adherents diminishes . . . she will lose many of her social privileges. . . As a small society, [the Church] will make much bigger demands on the initiative of her individual members…. It will be hard-going for the Church, for the process of crystallization and clarification will cost her much valuable energy. It will make her poor and cause her to become the Church of the meek .
. . The process will be long and wearisome as was the road from the false progressivism on the eve of the French Revolution — when a bishop might be thought smart if he made fun of dogmas and even insinuated that the existence of God was by no means certain . . . But when the trial of this sifting is past, a great power will flow from a more spiritualized and simplified Church. Men in a totally planned world will find themselves unspeakably lonely. If they have completely lost sight of God, they will feel the whole horror of their poverty. Then they will discover the little flock of believers as something wholly new. They will discover it as a hope that is meant for them, an answer for which they have always been searching in secret.
And so it seems certain to me that the Church is facing very hard times. The real crisis has scarcely begun. We will have to count on terrific upheavals. But I am equally certain about what will remain at the end: not the Church of the political cult, which is dead already, but the Church of faith. She may well no longer be the dominant social power to the extent that she was until recently; but she will enjoy a fresh blossoming and be seen as man’s home, where he will find life and hope beyond death.”
 - Joseph Ratzinger (Benedict XVI), from his book Faith and the Future

I find myself, today, overcome with joy in knowing that I am a member of Holy Mother Church! The same Church to whom Jesus entrusted Peter with her keys and proclaimed, "And so I say to you, you are Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church, and the gates of the netherworld shall not prevail against it." (Matt. 16:18)  It excites me to know that God has placed me and you here, in this moment of history, for a reason. I'm not always sure I know why, but I trust Him and humbly pray, every day, that I become the person He created me to be. May I be open to his will for me, here and now.

Finally, we must view the world and all that transpires through the lens of ETERNITY. Jesus has already proclaimed VICTORY. We are not of this world. We cannot put our hope in earthly governments and politicians - ultimately, our hope is in Him, our true joy! That doesn't mean we sit back and do nothing. We have a responsibility to help bring about His kingdom on earth, to be salt and light, to serve Him by serving others, to do our part to bring about the common good. The difficulties, persecutions, struggles and hardships that may accompany us along the way will pass away, just as one day, all the world will pass away. 

And at the end of my time here, after I've done all I can for Him, despite being hated by the world --  
“If the world hates you, realize that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, the world would love its own; but because you do not belong to the world, and I have chosen you out of the world, the world hates you. Remember the word I spoke to you, ‘No slave is greater than his master.’ If they persecuted me, they will also persecute you. If they kept my word, they will also keep yours." (John 15:18-20)
-- I hope to hear those loving words, "Well done, my good and faithful servant. (Matt 25:21) Welcome home."


O most Holy Trinity,
I adore you
who dwell by your grace in my soul.
Sanctify me more and more,
make me love you more and more,
abide with me evermore
and be my true joy. 
Amen.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Moonbeam

 "You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you."

Like some, she is not the type to revel in confrontation.
Mainly, she enjoys avoiding it altogether.

It's the lonely nagging of her soul
 that bothers her most of all; 
knowing that her opinions are not popular,
even among friends. 

Yet she cannot abandon 
the yearning of her heart.

The burden squeezes hot tears 
and all at once she cannot breathe. 

Restless and abandoned, she calls out to him 
as she sweeps spider webs 
from the porch light. 

She watches a small spider scurry away,
as a moonbeam slips through the clouds 
and tiptoes across her bed of pansies,
careful not to crush them.

He will find her there - 
in the night and all at once 
she will breathe again.



Friday, October 5, 2012

Of Chestnuts and Burning Leaves



I remember collecting chestnuts every Fall when I was a young girl. Their spiny, prickly burrs would lie in heaps on the ground beneath the spreading branches of the massive trees lining the neighborhood streets. My friends and I would scoop them up and carefully crack them open to find the glistening, deep-brown nut, flat on one side and oh, so smooth. I still recall how I loved to rub them between forefinger and thumb. I'm not sure what we did with them after that. I don't ever remember roasting them - but one could buy a small, brown bag of roasted chestnuts from vendors on the streets of New York City and sometimes along storefront sidewalks near my Long Island home.


On weekends, all over the neighborhood, homeowners raked leaves and burned them in metal trash cans with holes poked through them. 
The smokey aroma wafted through backyards, over small, moss covered ponds, 
creating halos around the heads of rosy-cheeked children racing bicycles down narrow, winding lanes. 
Autumn smelled delicious when I was a girl.


Many Autumns have come and gone since I was first enchanted by fallen chestnuts, 
but I am still captivated by her many gifts -- 

the chill in the air
pumpkins and apples

  the spread of crimson and gold against a crisp, blue sky
leaves swirling wildly along the breeze ahead of a cold front

 leather boots and sweaters and scarves
football on lazy, Sunday afternoons


wood burning in the fire pit surrounded by friends and family
hot toddies, spiced apple cider and yellow mums 
and more


Welcome dearest Fall! 
It's good to greet you once again.

Delicious autumn!  My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns.  ~ George Eliot

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

In Defense of my Mother, the Church

 "Not 100 in the United States hate the Roman Catholic Church, but millions hate what they mistakenly think the Roman Catholic Church is." -- Bishop Fulton J. Sheen

 
My sister spent all day last Saturday at a Eucharistic Congress sponsored by the Diocese of Charlotte. She called me on Sunday to share her impressions and thoughts about the day with me. She was so excited that I could hardly sneak a word in. "I kept thinking about you and wished you were there with me! You have to come down next year!" she exclaimed as she rattled off the dates for next year's event. The event typically begins with a Eucharistic Procession through the streets of Charlotte. How cool is that?! As the Catholic News Herald (Charlotte's diocesan newspaper) states on its event page:
"The 2012 Eucharistic Procession drew thousands of Catholics from across the Diocese of Charlotte. The spectacular procession takes the Blessed Sacrament from St. Peter Church to the Charlotte Convention Center, where the Eucharist is placed at the center of worship and attention throughout the two-day Congress"
My sister had an awesome, uplifting experience and she filled me in on all the highlights -- the best part for her was watching our older brother, one of the many Charlotte diocesan priests in attendance, witnessing and ministering to others as a true and humble servant of Christ and His Church. My sister related how moved she was to see him process into Mass with Bishop Jugis and all his brother priests. He has accomplished so much through God's grace, despite carrying the burden of cerebral palsy. She is so proud of him - as am I. And although it embarrasses him to no end - my sister and I both agree that we think he is a saint and will someday be counted among the great ones. She wishes all of our siblings had been there to see him. She just knew they, too, would be so proud of him.

My sister and I chatted for the better part of an hour. We shared how blessed we both felt to be faithful Catholic women. Sadly, I think there are a lot of non-Catholics and formerly baptized Catholics who leave the Church who do not fully understand what a treasure she really and truly is. I could have very easily been one of them and am grateful now that I resisted the temptation in my early adulthood to completely walk away. 

The majority of Catholics of my generation, for whatever reason, were very poorly catechized.  My sister and I both acknowledge that we didn't always adhere to Catholic teaching, partly due to bad catechesis and partly due to allowing ourselves to be swept up into the popular, secular culture. Rather than completely abandon the Church, we continued to half-heartedly practice our faith, ignoring or discarding those doctrines and teachings that hampered our so-called freedom to live as we wished, yet realizing, too, that the Church provided a steady anchor, a constant in a topsy-turvy world. And so, however imperfectly we continued to cling to her. And I'm so glad we did.

A variety of experiences - unique to our own circumstances - finally brought us both to a much broader and clearer understanding of the truth that the Church has promulgated from her inception over 2000 years ago. Rather than feeling oppressed by the same teachings we had formerly rejected, we soon found ourselves on fire for the faith and exceedingly eager to learn more. Fortunately, my sister and I sought out the proper, reliable sources to read and to study.  Most of what I had rejected were the teachings on contraception and reproductive health. After a while, I grew weary of the purely emotional rants that I had heard and rehearsed over and over again against Church teaching. I just wanted to formulate and cling to an argument based on reason, but what I discovered instead was a very reasonable answer in defense of Church teaching! Oddly enough, this all came about because my friend, a fellow catechist and I went to battle with our DRE and pastor (of a former parish) over the use of Protestant bibles being handed out to teachers and children for use in a Catholic religious education program. But that's a whole other story and I won't go into all the details here - only to say that dealing with this particular problem led me to delve into a whole slew of wonderful, enlightening explanations about why Catholics do what they do. Everything started making so much more sense, and I realized how wrong I had been. Praise God!

I know many Protestants of varying denominations - some of whom I am quite close to and a few of them I love with all my heart. I would jump in front of a bus for them, I love them that much. Despite our differences, I know that we share a mutual respect for our individual beliefs. The following beef is in no way intended to offend them. We are conservative Christians who are bound by our common fight against the atrocities of abortion, euthanasia and a host of other societal ills.

I have been increasingly annoyed, however, by those pesky little affronts against the Catholic Church posted by a variety of non-Catholic scoundrels in the comment boxes of Facebook posts, online articles and blog posts. You know the ones I mean: the Catholic Church is the whore of Babylon, the Pope is a sinner (duh!), Catholics pray to dead people and we worship Mary, just for starters. The internet is peppered with the nonsense. Part of me is flabbergasted that in this day and age these criticisms and untruths still exist. I remember fending off rails against our faith shortly after my family relocated to rural North Carolina from New York over 40 years ago. I recall that to some of the more hardcore fundamentalists we were Catholic Yankees doomed to Hell.  Some of them behaved as though we grew horns and ate our young! In varying degrees these attitudes still exists today. Most of what I encounter online, just like what I encountered all those years ago, is clearly based on ignorance of Catholicism and deep-seated misconceptions about what we believe and maybe even a little fear. Of course, I don't expect everyone to agree with the tenets of Catholicism, but I wish they would stop pretending to be an authority on Church teaching when clearly they have no idea what they are talking about! And how about we just let God worry about the salvation of my soul, hmm?

Should I just ignore these comments and anti-Catholic diatribes? Probably not a bad idea. I seriously doubt that rebuttals against Facebook rants ever really change minds and hearts anyway. But on the other hand, I have grown weary of saying or doing nothing in defense of something that means more to me than life itself. Does it behoove me to speak up against untruths, abuse and heresy? I think it does. Great men and women gave up their lives in defense of Holy Mother Church. If these great saints truly are my heroes (and they are) shouldn't I emulate them as best I can?

And so ...  I hope, here on my blog, to address some of the more misunderstood tenets of my faith in future posts. For the time being, however, I have discovered this Catholic apologetics site whose creator, John Salza, uses Scripture to defend and explain many of the teachings that non-Catholics find so troubling. Hopefully, it proves helpful to those interested in understanding more about Catholicism, especially my fellow Catholics. It is, of course, only one of many, many excellent sources out there.

Finally, as my sister expressed to me over the phone, I, too, cherish the profound beauty, the richness, the truth and the holiness of the Catholic Church. I will embrace Her until my dying day, because Christ lives in her - she is His Church. Through her members, His body, He reaches out to save the world. And it is where I go to meet Him, to receive Him intimately, to become one with Him in a loving embrace.

May God bless us all.












Wednesday, September 19, 2012

St. Therese Novena

Starting on Saturday, I am joining more than 24,000 Catholics to pray a


I’m actually trying to help this online prayer community (PrayMoreNovenas.com) to get 35,000 people praying this novena for St. Therese. 

A lot of people out there love St. Therese, so help me get this novena to them!
You can sign up for handy email reminders to get the the novena prayers here: http://www.praymorenovenas.com/st-therese-novena/

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God’s Mercy is abundant and overflowing, let’s share it!

Friday, August 31, 2012

Still Singing Those Back-to-School Blues

The cicadas rattle rhythmically, like several dozen maracas surreptitiously planted on tree limbs. Their song starts out soft and slow, then mounts quickly reaching a feverish crescendo, so loud and long it makes conversation outdoors difficult. September is on our doorstep. The late August mornings, heavy in dew, are cooler now and the sun drifts low behind my neighbor's rooftop much earlier in the day. Soon, as the maples and oaks turn crimson and gold the cicada song will cease, the petunias will die off to be replaced by a blaze of purple pansies and a glory of chrysanthemums. I love Fall. But I love Summer, too, and each year I relinquish my hold on it reluctantly. Ever since I was old enough to attend school, the ads for back-to-school sales always managed to elicit a very real sense of dread in the pit of my stomach. It continues to happen today, a split-second feeling of remorse at seeing all the notebooks, pencils, and lunchboxes overflowing the space at Target where only a few short weeks ago, I happily meandered through displays of patio furniture and flower pots. I remind myself that it's okay, really, I haven't been a student since I graduated from college over thirty years ago.

As a painfully shy elementary school girl I despised leaving my home to go off to school. I begged to be allowed to stay home with my beloved German Shepherd. I would simply miss her too much, but mostly I really never wanted to leave my mom. I would miss her even more. The best part of my day was hurrying out the doors of Higbie Lane Elementary as the dismissal bell clanged through the halls and classrooms. As first grade rolled into second and then into third it became much easier to head off to school. It certainly helped that I adored my third grade teacher. But then shortly after starting sixth grade my family moved to a place so alien that it turned my world upside down. 

In 1971 my parents moved themselves and seven children, two cats and a dog from Long Island, New York to a small town in the western foothills of North Carolina. Every morning for the first week we lived there, I bawled. I did not want to leave the comfort and familiarity of home to go to school. I was still anything but brave and now more insecure than ever before. Everything was different - the language (yes, it was English, but the drawl was very difficult for me to understand at first), the food, the surroundings, the religion, even the color of the dirt - everything. I did make friends relatively quickly, but looking back, that year in particular was especially difficult and the adjustment to my new surroundings came in fits and starts. By the time I was in eighth grade heading off to school was no big deal and any feelings of dread that I experienced during my ensuing high school years only cropped up when I failed to complete a class project on time or forgot to do my homework. I'm sure the idea of homeschooling never even entered my parents' minds way back then, so it was never an option and even if it had occurred to Mom and Dad, I'm not sure they would have done it. But I think I would have loved it, especially in the primary grades.

I suppose, as my husband and I were raising our four children, the separation anxiety and homesickness I often felt as a child resurfaced whenever I left my babies for an extended period of time, (i.e. more than say, an hour?). I fought the pressure from so-called experts, peers, friends, and family to send my children to preschool. I really didn't believe they would learn anything more than I could teach them at home and besides, I would miss them too much. And no, I did not feel the need to use preschool as a way of taking a break from them. When Katie, my oldest, was swallowed up by the big, yellow school bus on her very first day of kindergarten I thought my heart would break into a million pieces. I wore sun glasses so the other moms and dads wouldn't see my tears. It seems so silly in a way. She was only gone for a few hours as kindergarten at that time in our district was only half a day.

Katie, now a mother of two, confesses she hates to be apart from her babies. Even to do a little shopping, for less than an hour, only a few miles away while Nana (me) babysits. She knows, now, what I have been feeling since she was born. It is one of the reasons I eventually decided to home-school my kids. It is why I now scour Facebook every few hours to see if there's a message, a photo posted, a new status update from Megan who is spending a semester in Europe. It is why, even though I know it is a good thing, a step in the right direction, tears well up when I think of Erin leaving home for good. She moves out tomorrow. It is so silly, right? For goodness sake, she's only moving to Falls Church! It's just that there in my heart, I keep seeing her barely two, a mop of bouncing, brunette curls bobbing up and down, squealing with glee as she clambers out of her crib, so proud of herself for figuring out how to escape. It seems like yesterday. As she pursues her goal to practice medicine, who knows where the future will take her  - or any of them?

Of course, this condition - this sadness at separation - this empty nest syndrome - is nothing new or unusual. I've certainly written about it enough. Lately, my Facebook friends' statuses are replete with expressions of sorrow mixed with pride and excitement as they send their babies off to college - some several hundred miles away. As mothers we desperately want to hang on, even though we know letting go is really okay, healthy and normal. My mother - nearly 89 years old - still laments the distance rendering visits to my brother who lives in Texas and me difficult and infrequent. Our other five siblings all live nearby, which is very good for Mom and them, too. She recalls moments when she tearfully bid my eldest brother good-bye only days before Christmas as he headed off to boot camp in the late 1960's. She reminds me that she cried all the way home to North Carolina after visiting me for the first time after I moved away to northern Virginia. She hated seeing my older sister as a young newlywed drive away with her husband to settle into their new home in Indiana. And that same sister, who has returned to North Carolina, knows firsthand how absence and distance tugs at the heart as her daughter, son-in-law and their four children reside several miles away in Colorado. It's hard.

Many moms and dads relish this time of year. For years, I have seen them doing the happy dance and shouting hooray! Good for them! I really am glad they're so happy, but honestly, I've always been a bit mystified by their elation. I just don't get it. Just can't relate. And maybe that's an indictment of my own emotional instability. Maybe, I need to grow up. Letting go is long overdue.

Remember that Staples ad where the dad is blissfully dancing through the aisles, tossing school supplies into his shopping cart to the tune of It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year as his woeful children follow behind forlornly? This one:


I hate that commercial - it insults me. I am not that dad (or mom). But, maybe it's more than the fact that I actually mourned my kids going off to school all day. I think maybe it is because, in this commercial, I'm really the daughter. 

Maybe it is time for me to grow up.